most embarrassing...

***caution: if you don't like hearing about bodily functions, this is not the post for you!***

i can't decide whether it is more embarrassing for me or for kaleb...probably me since he doesn't care what people think of him.

so we head for church today, and corey and i are already down since kaleb hadn't pooped already by this time (that makes every sunday like walking on eggshells). i drop him off at nursery, instructing him to tell someone if he needs to go potty and telling the teacher that i will be back after the first class to take him to the bathroom. my first class ends. i go out in the hall. there is corey holding kaleb. corey says, "kaleb pooped his pants". i think to myself, damn it (and yes it is okay to think using profanities at church in this kind of situation!). i get him cleaned up and changed and he wants to go back to class. so i take him back.

i then go to corey's little class (he "sub"ed for his mom in the 11 year old class) and it goes great. at the very end of the class a head pops in and there is the 2nd counselor of the bishopric with kaleb saying that kaleb had accident...another one...another poopy one. i look at kaleb and he is walking like he has been riding a horse for three days. at this point i am angry (i won't share the profanity running through my head)...and then...AND THEN i look down and there is full on a piece of poop coming out of his pant leg and it falls on the floor. i am in shock at this point! there are three 11 year old boys, mouths wide open in disgust. just when i think it can't get worse, the 2nd counselor offers to pick it up and throw it away for me...and he was serious! i give him a stern look and a solid, "um, you don't have to do that" all while guarding the bowel movement on the floor until corey can find a piece of paper to pick it up with. I shew the counselor away and carry my excess-poop-producing 2 year old to the bathroom, clean him up, wait/hide until the next meeting starts and then i run to my car and go home, totally ashamed of what had just happened.

so here are my answers to the questions that i know are brewing in all of your heads (and mine):
1. no, i don't have any idea why the 2nd counselor was even in nursery let alone how he got assigned to bring my pants-filled-with-poop child to me out of nursery instead of the nursery teacher.
2. no, i will not consider putting a pull-up on my child during church just to avoid the situation again...i just feel like that would be taking a step backwards in the potty training and we have enough backward movement as it is.
3. yes, i do plan on monitoring his potty going a little bit better next time we go to church (which may not be for some time considering my embarrassment)
4. no, i didn't have any idea that such a little person could produce such large quanities of poop all in a two hour period.
and 5. no, i am not sure i will be able to look the 2nd counselor in the face ever, ever, ever again.

NOTE FOR SHANNON (if she ever reads this): debbie was with said 2nd counselor when all this went down...personally, i think i win the most embarrassing award where she is involved!